Monday, October 23, 2006

I Never Had Sexual Relations with That Congressman

U.S. congressman Mark Foley, who resigned from his post after disclosure of his inappropriate relationships with several teenage Capitol Hill pages, has now disclosed that he had been abused by a priest himself when he was a teenager.

Father Anthony Mercieca, the priest in question, admitted in turn to having a relationship with the thirteen-year-old Mark Foley, but denied charges of abuse, saying that they never went beyond fondling (with no rape or penetration involved) and that Foley “seemed to like it” (see CNN story here).

Asked to comment on the situation, former President Bill Clinton emphatically wagged his finger at reporters, and told them that “Father Mercieca did not have sexual relations with that man, Mr. Foley.”

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

I’ll Have That Grandmother In The Window

It’s official. Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie are the proud parents of an adopted one-year-old Malawian boy. Several children protection groups have raised concerns about the adoption’s expedited timing and Madonna’s planned $3 million donation to help Malawian children. Eye of the Child, a Malawi child protection group, has been very vocal in its condemnation of the adoption, likening it to a purchase of property by the pop star (see CNN story here).

Madonna’s publicists have not made any comment about the Malawian adoption, but they confirm that Madonna is not planning to make any changes to her current Christmas shopping list, which includes his-and-hers pairs of Iraqi twin babies, a younger and more hip grandmother, and a new brother-in-law as replacement for Ritchie’s annoying brother Kevin.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Annie, Get Your Gun!

The New York Times ran a story today on Greenleaf, a small Idaho town of 862, that is contemplating an ordinance recommending that all households in the town own a gun in ordered to be prepared in case of an emergency (see New York Times story here – may require registration).

Unreported, but also being considered by the town, an ordinance that would require the Greenleaf high school to purchase a shoulder-held surface-to-air missile launcher and a rocket-propelled infantry jet flame thrower to help deter students from smoking or making out under the school’s baseball bleachers.

[Oh and by the way, that story had already been covered by the Idaho Press-Tribune several weeks ago – way to go for the scoop, New York Times! (see Idaho Press-Tribune story here)]

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Barbra F---ing Streisand Is Back

Last night, after a 6-year absence, Barbra Streisand sold out Madison Square Garden in front of an audience that had paid up to $1,200 a seat to hear the legendary singer perform live (see New York Daily News story here). After being heckled by an audience member who apparently objected to a Streisand skit ridiculing President Bush, the singer charmed her New York audience by reverting to her best Brooklyn accent and telling the audience member to “shut the f-ck up”!

In a related copycat incident, at the end of a skit in which she joked about marrying Dick Cheney when her husband/father/manager Rene dies, Celine Dion responded to a heckling fan by telling the “c---sucker to take his sh-t and shove it up his gay motherf---ing ass!”

Monday, October 09, 2006

Hypo-Allergenic Kitty

The New York Times reported that Allerca, a bio-tech company, has begun marketing allergy-free cats selling for about $4,000. There is already a waiting list of close to two years for the animals (see New York Times story here – may require registration).

The Blurry Blogger has also learned that Allerca is already working on a line of dogs that automatically convert their own crap into alternative sources of energy.